How Mexico Beat Germany

How Mexico Beat Germany

This past week, my country totally beat Germany in the World Cup. How did they do it? According to an Independent article, my country men exposed “their full-backs” and “tied down” one of the German players. To get more insight into Mexican strategy, I interviewed Maximillian Sanchez, a chief soccer “strategist” and also a family member who plays a banker in the novella Bon Voyage Vietnam, due out August.

Poncho: So, tell me max, why do they call you “Money Max”?

Max: Cause I know how to expose German full-backs.

Poncho: Like, when they are sleeping?

Max: Not really. Cause they usually are smiling when they get exposed.

Poncho: And that was your strategy to beat Germany?

Max: Ah, man, we beat them so good.

Poncho: Did you do the beating?

Max: What do I look like? A prop in a Beat It video for Michael Jackson?

Poncho: Yeah, you right.

Max: We outsourced it.

Poncho: The beating?

Max: Nah, the tying down.

Poncho: Did you use rope?

Max: For boring gringos. We used fine hemp mixed in with some organic tea tree oil, mixed with fine Chanel No. 5, and Beethoven in the background.

Poncho: Fair trade hemp?

Max: What you think? These Germans would accept nothing else. So high maintenance.

Poncho: But you won.

Max: Yeah, but I don’t know if the hemp going to work on the Swedish.

Poncho: Why not?

Max: Cause they already got Ikea with them Swedish meta-balls.

Poncho: Meatballs.

Max: Those too.

About the author

Mr. Poncho M. Sanchez

Drinker/Sex Addict/Foodie/Diaper Mogul/Alleged Retired Cartel CEO