Mr. Earnest Hemingway? Ever heard of him? The Wall Street Journal penned an article about dressing like the author of Old Man And The Sea this summer. To get more insight into the original big “Papa,” I spoke to Mr. Hemingway from his home in Idaho.
Sophia: So, darling, if people want to look chic like you did during the summer on your boat, what would your advice be?
Earnest: Screw clothes.
Sophia: But the article references your favorite shorts.
Earnest: Yeah, well, on my boat, I rarely wore shorts.
Sophia: But you wouldn’t likely have many likes these days on Facebook if you did that. You don’t have a six pack.
Earnest: What are you talking about? I always bring a six pack with me on the boat. I fact, I normally brought more than one.
Earnest flashed his belly at me. I smoked my cigarette out of my holder and sipped my martini. I was amused.
Sophia: So part of being Hemingway chic is being comfortable with your non-existent six pack?
Earnest: Just because you don’t have a six pack doesn’t mean you are a bad kisser. Oftentimes, it’s the reverse.
He made a pass at me. I threw my martini in his face. He smiled. He ordered me another.
Sophia: So, in your view, it’s not rude to be nude?
Earnest: Its only rude to be nude and brood on my boat.
Sophia: Merely because you don’t have a six pack?
Earnest: There are more important things than six packs, Ms. Gordon.
At that point, my martini came. Earnest handed it to me. He smiled. To learn more about Mr. Hemingway and his fighting against Nazis during World War II, among other things, read Writer, Sailor, Soldier, Spy.