Because laughing is better than crying, except at your spouse's funeral.
Me: Have a martini, darling, and see why laughing is better than crying, except at your spouse’s funeral.
You: Thanks, yummy martini, but maybe I want to laugh at my spouse’s jazz funeral?
Me: In that case, read or listen to Quality Filth’s criminal satire.
You: It’s illegal?
Me: No, darling. All it is is fictional antiheroes from six satirical crime thriller novels or novellas who satirize political news on a weekly basis from the center.
You: So it’s not CNN?
Me: No, because Quality Filth is proud of its surreal fake news.
You: But Quality Filth isn’t Fox News, either?
Me: No, cause foxes are fast, tortoises are slow, and Quality Filth’s pace is slower than a retired Bronx grandmother swimming in South Beach.
So please enjoy listening to or reading this rubbish on Quality Filth. In the meantime, for a sleeper killer martini recipe, please e-mail me at email@example.com.
Yours sort of truly,
Sir Winston Black
Butler/Budget Painter/Corporate Strategist/Legendary Spook